Celebrate Valentine’s Day on the Couch
in defense of home date night
Dear readers,
It’s the Wednesday before Valentine’s Day, do you have a reservation yet? If you just started to panic, don’t. I’d even go so far as to urge you to cancel your reservation if you have one. Why? Because home date nights are the best date nights. Let me present my case.
The Why
Cooking together is an opportunity for you to:
test your partner’s marriageable qualities: do they take instruction well? Can they be trusted around sharp objects? Do they know how to read?
learn something new: scientists have proven that there’s nothing sexier than doing new things together — even outside of the bedroom.1
divide labor fairly: get with the times!
spend quality time together – in whatever pants you want: I’m a big fan.
The What
If you’re sold on the “why,” let’s get to the “what.” The ideal home date night set-up:
requires nearly equal contributions.
takes < 100 minutes to complete.
won’t put you to sleep right away (limited amount of tryptophan; nothing too heavy).
includes champagne or another celebratory treat (
did a great roundup of strains for the occasion).is cute.
The How
The Division of Labor
Most relationships seem to have a primary and a secondary in the kitchen. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics and USC, the primary for both cognitive (e.g., planning) and physical (e.g., grunt execution) is usually the lady of the house.2 3
This year, let’s try to divide up the work more fairly. Each person should be responsible for a few of the tasks in each category:
The Menu
Here are three achievable menus, and some suggested roles and responsibilities — to divide the physical and cognitive labor — this Valentine’s Day. Detailed, person-by-person instructions are below my signature.
City of Love — Minus Plane Fare [Easy, GF, DF]
If you’re in the mood for something fancy and French, but don’t have the time or energy for a soufflé, this is for you. Make sure you get all your prep done first — the cooking comes together really quickly.
Mussels with Leeks and White Wine [J. Kenji Lopez-Alt]
French Fries with Aioli [Jody Abrams]: Just buy the fries. Alexia’s are great!
Green Salad with Olive Oil and Lemon Juice: Whatever greens look good
Bittersweet Chocolate Mousse With Fleur de Sel [Melissa Clark]: I know I pitch this recipe a lot, but it is so easy. If you’re sick of it, a chocolate chip cookie (or six) would do.
If He Says it’s Not a Complete Meal Without Meat [Easy, GF, DF]
Dump him (jk). Compromise on a duck leg. This one, cooked slowly in its own fat (drool) is crispy and decadent — not a compromise at all! Use some of that fat to flavor little potatoes. Cut through the fat with some vinegary bitter lettuces and, for dessert, an easy banana sundae.
Slow Roasted Duck Leg [There’s Food at Home]: it’s like a duck confit, but easier. Cook time can vary depending on the size of the legs, so budget a full 90 minutes for the roast.
Duck Fat Potatoes: luckily you’ll have duck fat leftover to make these on repeat.
Frisée Salad with Dijon Vinaigrette: or another bitter, crunchy lettuce.
Caramelized Banana Sundae [Nigel Slater]: it’s like the laziest banana foster. I wish I could un-learn that this exists.
DIY Pasta [Intermediate, Vegetarian]
If you’re up for a true collaborative effort, ricotta gnocchi is the best introduction to homemade pasta. This version is pillowy, nutty, and buttery. For dessert, finish it all with an easy Tarte Tatin — just make sure you put the puff pastry in the fridge the night before.
Ricotta Gnocchi [J. Kenji Lopez-Alt] with Herby Mushrooms and Sage Browned Butter [Half-Baked Harvest]
I tried 4 ricotta gnocchi recipes and the Lopez-Alt method of draining the ricotta and bonus egg yolk was superior. Use the Half-Baked Harvest method for the mushies, or freestyle with another veg. You can skip the breadcrumbs (I do), but don’t skip the browned butter and herby bits!
Easy Apple Tarte Tatin [Julia Moshkin, has an excellent version as well!] Feel free to add a bit of cinnamon or cardamom to the caramel. FWIW, I’ve prepped the apples day-of and been fine, but experts say you should prep them the night before.
Other Stuff & Things
On Monday, scientists announced that coffee might help your microbiome, and hours later, coffee futures in NYC jumped 6%. Is there a connection? No, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see gut-healthy coffee brands on Instagram soon.
Thinking a lot about microplastics, including the spoon currently living rent-free in my brain, and wondering if public health comms can be both effective and not clickbaity.
What is going on in Big Food Media? Bucking the trend of years of closures, layoffs, moves to Substack, and acquisitions in other outlets, the NYT is doubling down by investing in booking outside talent and video and Food52 continues to expand its marketing team.
Note: why hasn’t a Workday rep noticed that NYT still has a separate Greenhouse careers page?
I had a major miss this Super Bowl — even more than the Chiefs (sorry) — I had 5 people panic call/text me for menu ideas with dietary restrictions. If I’m doing this this time next year, I’ll do a round-up!
I just love love,
Sophia
Now get to the grocery store and make some of these: (if you need help navigating)
Thank you, NIH, for maintaining these incredible scientific resources. Please continue.
Bureau of Labor Statistics, 2023.
University of Southern California, The Fair Play Method: Can We Solve for the Unequal Division of Domestic Labor? 2024.
We DO have a res but if we didn’t, I would be aiming for option 2. (I’m the one who says it’s not a meal without meat)